For weeks--possibly months--our Suburban has been in need of a hearty shoveling. I continually put off the task, though, because whenever I thought of doing it I quickly remembered an upcoming event that would only make the car even dirtier; such as our road trip to Utah a few weeks ago, or last Friday's Father and Sons camp out. (I use the same rationale with the kitchen floor) However, after the boys rolled back into town yesterday morning in a car brimming with camping filth and all the stink that that implies, I knew the time had come. I drove over to the car wash/free all-you-can-stand-vacuuming place off University and went to town on the interior. On my way there I realized I had a headache--which made me feel like I was multi-tasking. I usually end up with a headache from the offensively loud vacuums and so having one already seemed like the best "two birds, one stone" scenario.
Of course before I could vacuum I had to remove the larger items of debris, such as:
2 footballs
1 roll of duct tape
4 books
several empty water bottles
7 pony tail holders
1 DVD
2 maps
1 unopened single-serving Sour Cream and Onion Pringles cup
2 combs, each missing several teeth
1 headlamp (the kind worn while biking)
1 empty water jug (quart size)
1 portable DVD player cord for use in a car (remember when our trip totally sucked a few weeks ago? It was because we couldn't find this cord. Oh, and because we took 5 cranky kids with us.)
What I want you to understand from the foregoing list is these are the things I found hidden in the car, under the seats. I had previously emptied the entire car before I left for the car wash, or so I assumed.
Once there, I made several humiliating realizations:
1) Our car mats are so disgustingly filthy that I couldn't in good conscience hang them up for all to see on the provided "car mat holders" while I vacuumed them, on account of other people judging us. Underneath all the crumbs and sand and stuck-on gummy candies, it appears as if the mats have been used while changing oil, or possibly during the slaughter of small yard animals.
2) I have no shame when it comes to abusing high-powered vacuums belonging to others. If it fit down the tapered nozzle (and sometimes it wouldn't without a little coercion), I sucked it up. Things like unopened pistachios, full-sized straws, water bottle lids, sticks from suckers, round fruit snacks (not without a fight) and miniature playing cards. Other things that wouldn't go down even when I forced the issue would be wadded napkins and your larger Lego pieces. Just know that I tried.
3) Our car was so dirty that it took over 45 continuous minutes to vacuum the entire thing.
How happy was I to finish and drive through the car wash, all relaxing and eating my Pringles! Since I had washed the inside windows and scrubbed all the seats before I left for the car wash, my 2 hour car cleaning extravaganza was complete as I drove my dripping car back home. Yay me!
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2 comments:
were your kids brimming with delight at the sight of this new car? Or were they upset that they could no longer find their hidden treasures where they put them... for later usage (ie the unopened pringles and duct tape might be a real good thing when in a pinch) hehe. Your story sounded much like ours... only you say it so much better.
Add a few petrified chicken nuggets, a decapitated barbie (!), and something that looks suspiciously like a wad of hair matted with gum and yanked out and... you would have my van. It was so bad last year that if I forgot "show and tell Friday" for the girls' preschool, I could park the van, dig for a minute and find 3 items that all started with whatever the letter of the week happened to be. Oh, the shame.
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