Heaven

I've come a long way in my sewing projects since my humble beginnings. Black Naugahyde slippers, anyone? But few of my sewing creations have brought more joy to my life than our new teddy bear sheets.

About two years ago I found the most delicious chocolate brown minky blanket at Walmart. King size, with matching brown velvet edge banding--35 bucks. It is without a doubt our favorite blanket. I defy you to find a softer blanket. I bought the identical blanket (queen size but cream colored) at the same time, and do you know what? It's not nearly as soft as the brown one. It is truly one of the mysteries of my life.

Anyway, I think it is time to finally reveal to you something rather personal about myself and my sleeping habits. No, this isn't about my almost nightly hallucinations involving spiders and mice falling onto my face from the ceiling above. This is about my true feelings regarding bedsheets. I prefer them untucked. No. I demand them to be untucked. At the beginning of our marriage, this was actually a source of contention between Pie and myself. But good news! I got my way years ago and I've never looked back. I have always found a tightly tucked top sheet to be:

1) Uncomfortable. When I'm sleeping on my back my feet end up smooshed to the side. I might as well just pretend I am in the olden days of China and practice foot binding.

2) Too cold. A sheet that is tightly tucked in causes cold air pockets around the feet. That's no good. Warm feet are much easier to achieve by the "pocket technique". When I climb into bed on a cold night, I immediately flip the blanket under my feet. It's like a blanket sandwich and it's fantastic.

3) Too hot. Alternately, in the warmer months a tucked sheet keeps my feet too warm. I like to snorkel in the summer--sleep with my body covered by a blanket, but my feet sticking out the bottom for climate control. Try it!

4) Too fussy. I love a bed that looks nicely made, but the less I am involved in that process the better. While spending a couple of summers in Norway as a teen, I noticed how simple the bedding was. A bottom fitted sheet. A thin feather blanket inside a duvet cover. Oh, and a pillow. That was it. You just pulled the blanket straight when you got up in the morning and you were done. For years I have tried to convince Pie to go the no-top-sheet route but that man will not be swayed. (You win some and you complain about the rest.)

So now that you know my true feelings on sheets, let me tell you about my awesome new teddy bear sheets. Remember that brown minky blanket? I noticed a few months ago that it was actually two pieces of fabric sewn together. So. I took the velvet binding off and separated the two minky pieces. I sewed the velvet trim back onto one blanket (top sheet) and sewed elastic around the edges of the other one. And viola! A brand new sheet set of the softest, warmest, most yummiest fabric you have ever had the pleasure of hibernating in.

I was concerned at first that I wouldn't be able to wear my flannel sock monkey pajamas to bed anymore because of, you know, the static electricity produced every time I rolled over. Surprisingly, that is not a problem. But with such warm sheets I don't even need my flannel jammies anymore! Of course all of the other blankets help too. Going on top of the top sheet is not one, but two feather blankets, totalling well over 8 inches of I'm-not-getting-out-of-this-bed-until-I-absolutely-have-to snuggliness. And I'll tell you what. Between So You Think You Can Dance Autumn edition, my new sheets and a year's supply of ingredients for 7 layer bars, I say winter can arrive at it's leasure...

LET IT SNOW LET IT SNOW LET IT SNOW!