It's As Plain As The Nail Polish On Your Face

Usually when Tommy is out a-deed doing, I am immediately made aware of the situation. Because nine times out of ten, what ever he has gotten into he is careful to first put all over his face. And then he comes and sits down next to me, innocent as a lamb.

Remember this?

And the Hitler shave?

More recently, it was two different colors of Josie's nail polish. Garish.

Purple highlighter, because a blank forehead is a terrible thing to waste. (Brownies are also a terrible thing to waste, especially on the little folk who are just as happy spooning Peaches & Cream oatmeal dry out of the packet. Not to imply that my kids do that sort of thing.)

Sometimes it's not only on his face but also down his shirt. Like 2 weeks ago at the "Famous Americans" presentation.

I truly appreciate Tommy's habit of telegraphing his little forays into naughtiness, because I am a busy woman and it saves me oodles of time. I mean, how else would I know that Tommy has been making sandwiches if he didn't show up at the end of my shower with peanut butter and jelly applied liberally about his face and neck? It's times like these that I am grateful for what I lovingly refer to as "average intelligence". I tell you what, it's the smart kids that are sneaky. Tommy reminds me of those bumbling bank robbers who always get caught--like the guy who robbed a bank on one side of town and then mild-manneredly drove to his branch on the other side of town.....to deposit the stolen money. See? This is a guy I feel I can keep a few steps ahead of.

And for those times when Tommy doesn't lather himself up good with Tilex or Spray-N-Wash, there is always his tell-tale sign of impending naughtiness: Clearing the decks, as it were.

"Mom--go to the office. Go take a shower. Go fix the laundry."
Just this morning he said, "Mommy--I want you to go down to the basement." He said this to me while he was sitting on the upstairs bathroom counter holding an empty water balloon. He's a sly one for sure! I foiled his little water experience, but later on I found this:

When I asked him why he put banana peels in the mail box (hey! that reminds me, I was going to go looking for peeled bananas) he answered:

Lions eat banana peels.

We aren't lions, Tommy.

But Mommy, we are all brothers.

Touche. So maybe he gets his average intelligence from me.

**Hi Katie! I got your birthday card and loved it! You are always so good at remembering--and I am not. Glad to know you are reading the blogs!