A few things for your consideration:
I hate it when I sneeze and someone says Bless you. I know that they are just being sociable and that Bless you is the standard comment when someone sneezes, but why? We don't acknowledge it when someone burps in public, or hiccups, or passes gas..... why the big production with sneezes? They really aren't all that special--certainly not inherently superior to hiccups, which are adorable and annoying--sneezes are disgusting! What we should really be saying is Bless ME! when somebody sends germy wetness out of their face at 100 mph. Personally, I would like to just be left alone to sneeze without all the fanfare. (And if you don't say Bless you when someone else sneezes, you are made to feel like a churlish brute!) Also, I am a double sneezer, every time. So this creates quite the awkward moment for the would-be well-wisher. Bless You, again? I don't think so.
I hate it when a woman says "I love my curves". What she means is, she loves her boobs. She is not referring to a well upholstered bottom or bunchy thighs or a rippled stomach that resembles soft-serve ice cream. She is talking about her boobs. She should just admit that.
I hate it when people won't use the word "hate". Kids probably shouldn't use it, because it will lead to the inevitable "and please bless Mom to never make Salmon again for dinner because we all really hate it" prayer, but grown-ups, please. We know you hate stuff, so just say so. Try being authentic.
But then again,
I love it when Tommy needs to tell me a "secret". I lean in real close and he holds my face in his hand as he whispers some indecipherable babble into my ear at zero decibels. He makes no sound whatsoever, but I can feel his breath in my ear. It is really quite charming. I then tell him I have a secret for him and whisper "I love you" in his ear and he just walks away because he doesn't give a rat's rump. I think he will be good at keeping secrets when he grows up.
I love it that my little sister is having a girl (I WAS WRONG, KIRSTEN!!!) and I will get to go see them after she gets here--here being Idaho--and love that baby up a bit. A new baby to squish, and I won't even have to birth it!
I love it when I can stay in my Target Sock Monkey Flannel Pajamas all day. If I can stay home and just fiddle around my house and eat snacky foods and spend way too much time reading all your blogs and not have to get dressed to greet the public at the grocery or the Wal Mart or the gas station, that is a good day. Today is a good day.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
9 comments:
"Bless you!" (for the next time you toot). Is that better? Thanks for your comedy relief this afternoon. Just what I needed. And I too love those little 2 and 3 year old secrets. That's when I tell my kids (that do that) that they're my favorite child.
julie also HATES that we are telling people our baby's name 4 months prior to her birth... it really makes me her mad.
we're excited to have you here with the new one. loves.
Right now I'm trying to decide if I love or hate the word churlish. While I applaud your diversity of diction...the word itself reminds me a little of girlish and strangely, a little of something that is very fat. I'm not sure where that came from.
On a side note, I think you are absolutely correct in your assessment of the curves/boob situation. When someone says that I also think, "You just want to justify unlimited twinkie intake." So, what they should really say is, "I love that my boobs are big and the fact that this physique is partially the result of never-ending twinkies is just an added bonus."
The end.
For shame...Bless You is such a sweet, fun way to assert yourself into someone else's health. Boo hiss.
But you redeemed yourself with the PJ's. :) I, too, have had a good day.
Julie, do you remember when you wrote the post below about Calvin making it to the toilet everytime. I totally congratulated you and still do. And I said I'd understood, because David had been sick, along with Ryan for a couple of days. We are now on Day 9 of this throwing up/diarrhea phase. EVERYONE IS DOING IT!!! What's wrong with our family??! But not to worry, Matthew made it to the toilet for the first time today.
Oh and I love reading about the things you love about your kids and your choco incident. I do that with ice-cream. It just suddenly starts to diminish, and then one day, Ryan comes home, opens the freezer, and "Where did the 1/2 gallon of Blue Bell go"? Why does he even ask? "The boys ate the whole thing." Obviously not. He might as well just look at my hips when he comes in the door--then he'll know and we'll save ourselves from these ever-embarrassing conversations.
I love the thing about the curves. So true, so true.
Er, I plead guilty to seeing someone a year later, and from one work Christmas party to the next, she had gained a little bit of weight, and referenced it. What to do? WHAT TO DO?!!! I complimented on her CURVES, Julie. I DID. I am such a sham of a hypocrite of a person, because I am completely in agreement on the boobs/curve statement.
I had a high school teacher who could sneeze to beat the band. We're talking a category 5 sneeze here. Mayor Nagin pleaded with our class to not come back too soon each time he sneezed. . .
. . . uh, where was I. Oh, that's right. So, this teacher's sneezes were always followed by "bless me, screw all of you". You'd have to know the guy but it was pretty funny at the time.
Post a Comment