Rise and Shout! The Cougars Are Out!

So, ya'll know I'm too much of a book snob to go crazy about the Twilight series. I read it, I'm not gonna lie. I liked it. I didn't loooove it and I certainly think the whole series has been over hyped to an offensive degree. Stephanie Meyers has a fabulous imagination and her general concept of vampires and werewolves living among us is something I find rather fascinating. BUT. She's corny. Her dialogue between characters is generally cringe-worthy. She reminds me a lot of George Lucas, actually, for that very reason. Throughout all 4 of her books in the series I kept wishing how another writer--a more capable writer--could have written the books so much better. (I liken it to watching two of the lesser dancers from SYTYCD, maybe one of the tappers and that Channing fellow (ha!) dancing a Travis Wall routine. All that potential brilliance frittered away in the hands of the less capable.)

And then there are her movies. Twilight was laugh out loud funny in some parts--parts that were certainly not meant to be funny. And the acting. Oy vey. I guess the biggest disappointment for me was how true to the book the movie turned out--stilted dialogue and all. But still....we watched it anyway. And then New Moon. A second chance. Regardless of all the bad reviews out there, Pie and I saw it Saturday night and actually really liked it. Was it AMAZING? No. Was it ever so much better than the first one? Ahhh.....Yes. Much. We both felt it was worth our (discount ticket) price of admission.

Just a few items that made this sequel better than the first? Well, even though we are still saddled with the gorgeous Kristen Stewart (graduate of the Blinky MacStammerson school of acting) she gets to act most of the movie in her comfort zone--attractively pathetic/sullen/pouty--and so she's fine. Rob Pattinson definitely gets his American accent much more together this time around, which is nice, and there are less parts in the movie when you aren't trying to suppress inappropriate laughter during his scenes (Twilight, the part when he first "smells" Bella in science class? Garry Shandling could have acted that scene and I would have found it less funny.) I for one could have done without his bare (pasty, flabby, muscles-airbrushed-on-with-makeup) chest in the final scenes. Which brings us to the award for Most Improved Actor:

Mr. Taylor Lautner.

(No airbrushing required)

Remember after the first Twilight when the talk was that 16 year old Taylor would need to be replaced because the next movie required him to grow into, like, The Hulk over just a few months? Well, let's just say it's a good thing Taylor isn't a professional athlete because Dude has obviously eaten his weight in steroids since the last movie. The kid is ripped. Which is helpful since he spends most of the second half of the movie in nothing but cutoffs and running shoes. Let's just say this would have been a different movie if Edward was shirtless for that amount of screen time. But seriously, the best thing about the "new" Jacob was his acting. SERIOUSLY! He did such a better job this time around (ditching that hideous wig half way through also helped.) Kelly, you were right all along!

I've read a few places on the internet about how grown women (cougars) are feeling a little uncomfortable regarding their movie crush on a kid not yet old enough to vote. Me? All I can say is thank goodness for Pie and that he's not the pasty, flabby type. Not to be impertinent, but if you haven't met my husband Pie, he is a rather muscle-y dude himself. I guess you could say it's one of those "why go looking for hamburger when you've got steak at home" kind of things.